Kenneth C., Brookville Intermediate School
Big Boy
As I looked in the mirror I ran my hands through my hair and straightened my jacket one last time, I had to look perfect on my first day at a new school. “You look handsome, go get em’.” my mom complimented me as I walked out the door. I felt confident, this would be a great year. I was enthusiastic as I walked in the door, but as I walked the hallways I glanced at a nearby mirror, and my mood fell. I was ugly, and fat.
I have always felt shameful of my size and build, and insecure in general. This held me back… I went through everyday with my head down, and I continued to live my life like this, always caring about what others think. Social events became difficult for me, and it seemed as if everywhere I went some looked at me disgustedly.
I continued this way the entire year, and when the year was over I was offered a spot in a community service group, and having nothing else to do, I took the job. I started helping others regularly, and my mind started to shift off of topics concerning myself. I found myself enjoying doing work for others, and I started to realize that my situation wasn’t all that bad. I mean, some of these people live in poverty and whatnot, while I grumble about how I look.
As I continued helping others, I worried about myself less and less, and as I worried less I started to care about others more. I also realized that there’s nothing wrong with me and who I am. I’m different from others, and that’s O.K. And when tragedy struck my hometown, I didn’t care about who I was. I didn’t care what I looked like, I made others my priority.
Being confident in yourself isn’t about being perfect or about what others think about you, it’s about who really are and what you do. Everyone is different, some people are bigger, some are smaller, some are smarter and some are not. We tend to obsess over these things, but if we focus more on others we can start to realize the beauty in ourselves. The legacy you leave behind isn’t based off of your social status or amount of friends, it’s based on how you lived your life. It isn’t about what others think of you, it’s the difference that you made in the world, and in others.
